2349

now i know what's hectic!

i dont like being so occupied! screwed my chemistry test today, prepared to screw my maths test tomorrow. there's shooting competition on wednesday and chinese public speaking competition on saturday!

this is too busy. and i am extremely bad in maths! i cant pass this psychological barrier. it's there, and i cant get rid of it. i must wake up to read on vectors tomorrow. i had never been more ill-prepared than this. 0 confidence at all.

i seriously think that passing the previous test is really a gift from lady luck. i hate to say it but really, i cant do maths. there are just numbers aren't they? or perhaps they are more than number. i'm the one without logic so i cant manipulate them effectively! DARN.

i messed up my whole life and i dont know how to pick up. i'm procrastinating and not doing anything to help alleviate my anxieties. should i trust that it is possible to get A even if you fail your maths throughout your jc years or should i believe that there's no such thing on earth.

my heart tells me to go with the former while my mind says the latter. life's so complicated. i just wish to be back in mae hong son. disconnect from the world and live my secluded life. no excessive worries, no excessive worries...

i thought i could understand maths for once, but it turned out otherwise. in the end, i still conceded defeat and resigned to fate. an act of loser perhaps.

i love maths i can do maths
i love maths i can do maths
i love maths i can do maths
i love maths i can do maths
i love maths i can do maths
.
.
.

when propaganda fails too...

MMHS!