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haven been doing productive work at all. everyday i slack and sleep after 2 and wake up the next day after 12. then time seems to fast forward after that and immediately i'm at training. then time fast forward again and it's 2 before i know. is this the case for everyone? this is kinda scary!

been thinking a lot these few days but i dont know how to pen down my thoughts. i start to think what i want to be in the future. i'm somewhat tired of studying but i must complete the course. i dont know what course i want to take in U but i know it's gonna be totally irrelevant. tough choice.

i want to host reality show. the ones which the host gets to go around the world and explore. be it for fun or to do good deeds. though i prefer the latter but the former is just as satisfying. well, it's always fun to have others pay the cost for you to travel. i want to see the world through my own eyes and learn about places around the world.

BUT, i think chances are slim because such things are kinda rare in singapore. i mean you have to step into the showbiz and dwell on a lot of other things first before you can become such a host. furthermore, not everyone gets the chance to host such programme. you can't possibly go and tell mediacorp "i want to host this and this tv shows, give it to me!".

next, after i am done with A div for shooting, i'm going to play basketball. argh!~ cant stand the craving for basketball games. i must endure till after A div because i dont want my wrist to "unlock" or become way to flexible. tsk! ENDURE...

okay, introducing everyone my new-found love: Choz O Cream from DonutEmpire. it's freaking sweet but that's why i love it (i guess). i have a photo of it but i'm lazy to post it because it means i have to do a lot of re-adjustment and stuff. so till the day i'm in the mood to post photos!

something is missing in my life and i have really no idea what is it. i feel as if i am living life aimlessly. the last time i dodged this feeling was when i was in mae hong son. perhaps it was because i was doing something i truly love and i was really enjoying myself. the rest of the time i feel as though i'm idling. doing nothing constructive.

i need to shed this feeling before it becomes a problem. maybe it had already become one. i dont know. i think it is a good thing that i have two years to think of what i want to do in army. then again, i hope to serve the police or best air force during my national service. i want to travel. definitely after As.

sometimes i wonder what is the use of studying. i mean you need experience for almost everything. why not we start from learning experience instead of memorizing theories? i don't know. this question is quite ironic and we wont get far if we continue to argue about it. seriously, i see no point. perhaps, it's just a set of procedures the world follows to differentiate the best from the not-so-good.

well then i will say, i am just someone who is trapped in that procedures. i am there to facilitate the process and in another words, serving the best to help them identify that they are indeed the best. darn. i dont know what i am saying. it's all contradicting and ironic. tsk. i think i shall end here today. my thoughts are not coordinated.